Positive Words: In Praise of Praise, Part 2
The art of patting someone on the back is not complicated. First we have to train ourselves to see goodness. For instance, we can spare a child the ignominy of being a total failure at needlework when she crochets bedroom slippers if we ignore the lumps and uneven stitches and point out that the pompoms are positively perfect.
To be effective, praise must be sincere. Dishonest praise makes fools of both parties. It works more harm than good, as does all deception eventually. One young woman told her aunt that her bread pudding was delicious, although she almost choked on it. She has been eating double portions of bread pudding at her aunt’s house ever since! (more…)
Positive Words: In Praise of Praise, Part 1
Last week I wrote a poem for children about good words to say like “Please” and “Thank you.” This prompted me to think about good words for adults to say. Of course, words like “Excuse me” and “Thank you” are ingrained habits by now, but we might not always state what needs saying. I recall once introducing my niece to someone and remarking what a great job she does at her workplace. My niece responded, “Aunt Kathy, that’s the first time you ever said you liked what I do.” Hmm. I realized that perhaps I’ve been stingy with words of praise. We might mentally acknowledge someone’s success or good qualities and yet fail to let the person know our thoughts. We might take someone’s achievements for granted. I recall times when people have commented on something I did and what a boost it gave me. It’s an act of charity to say things like “Congratulations,” “I like how you always do kind things for people,” or “I wish I could grow a garden as beautiful as yours.” (more…)
Happiness Tips for When You’re Blue
On the news this week it was reported that 11% of Americans were on anti-depressants. That’s sad! We were made to be happy, and we wish it for others, saying “Happy Easter, Happy Birthday, Merry Christmas.” Why aren’t so many of us happy? Of course, we can blame the theological reason: original sin that stole heaven’s bliss from us. Still, some modicum of happiness is within reach here on earth. We know the joy that comes from a job well done, a surprise party, a newborn baby, a gorgeous nature scene, and someone loving you. Experiences like those leave us bubbling over with happiness. There are stretches of time when we are content, at peace and enjoy getting up in the morning. Joy evaporates, however, when tragedy strikes, stress builds up, or failure darkens our life. Sometimes we might feel blue for no identifiable reason. At such times we might cry, wish we hadn’t been born, try to drown our sorrows in alcohol, or hate getting out of bed. (more…)
Tearing the Veil before God’s Presence
A woman attending my Bible study commented that she never knew the meaning of the veil of the sanctuary being torn at the crucifixion. The next Sunday, our pastor began his homily speaking of this veil. In the Jewish temple there was a veil separating the rest of the space from the Holy of Holies, the room where God dwelt. No one could enter the Holy of Holies except the high priest once a year on Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement. The rest of God’s people were restricted to different spaces: the Court of the Women, the Court of Priests, and the Court of Gentiles. They had no direct access to God. The veil being torn in two has profound symbolism. By his death, Jesus made it possible for all of us, not only the high priest, to stand in the presence of God. (more…)
Dying to Rise: Reflections
My weekly post straddles Holy Week and Easter Week, so I pondered whether to focus on the passion and death of Jesus or his resurrection. Then it occurred to me that I should cover both. After all, these paschal mysteries are intimately related. It was only by suffering and dying that Jesus was able to rise with glorious new life. For him and for us the adage holds true: No cross, no crown. At every Eucharist we enter into both his death and resurrection. Dying and rising is a motif found in nature. Jesus himself pointed out how a seed must die in order to bring forth new life. Underground, seeds burst open and are no longer seeds but become lovely flowers or food for us. Three hundred sixty-five times a year, the sun dies and all is dark, but we can count on the life-giving sun coming up again the next morning. Each night we experience a “little death” as we sleep, but then we arise with new vigor the next day. Every winter when the cold, barren world seems dead, we know there will be a spring someday, even after this record-breaking winter! I’m reminded too of those gigantic redwood trees that must succumb to fire before the seeds in their cones are released to produce new trees. (more…)
