Imperfections and Failures, Pros and Cons
Imperfections can have pros and cons. I recently produced an imperfect baby blanket. As I finished crocheting it, I ran out of the variegated yarn with four shell stitches left to make. Rather than ripping out the last incomplete row, I used white, sparkling yarn to make those four shells. So, yes, my blanket is imperfect. Hopefully, no one will notice. A side benefit was that my sister taught me how to make a new border using that white yarn for a ruffle.
Beauty in Imperfections
I took comfort in the fact that the Navajo inserted a mistake on purpose as they wove blankets. Supposedly this was to honor their gods, who alone are perfect. For the same reason, the gorgeous ceilings in mosques have small irregularities. Japanese artists add imperfections in their work as a necessary ingredient called “wabi-sabi.” This could be asymmetry, roughness, or a blemish like a crack. People can find beauty in imperfections, which make things unique.
Flaws can also add value. Coins minted with an error and stamps printed with a mistake can be worth thousands of dollars.
Imperfect Bodies
Because we are the result of evolution, some features of our bodies are imperfect. For one example, we hiccup. When fish and amphibians first emerged on land, they needed gills for oxygen in water and lungs on land. In water they could close the entrance to the lungs. Sometimes when we take in air, ancient muscles close the entrance to our lungs.
Dimples are a defect in a muscle, but a charming defect. Beauty marks and freckles too are flaws, but some people find them attractive.
The Search for Perfection
At the age of 73, Michelangelo was working on a 10-year project: the Florentine Pieta, probably intended for his tomb. At one point, he was so dissatisfied either with his work or with a flaw in the marble that he hacked his masterpiece, breaking a leg. Later an assistant repaired it.
This reminded me of my favorite artist who illustrated some of my works. The publisher was not happy because it too her so long. She explained to me that when she woke up in the morning and looked at her work of the previous day, she didn’t like it and tossed it. Probably some pictures in her wastebasket excelled other artists’ work.
I also recall having an opportunity to use a potter’s wheel for the first time. I tried to make a dish as a Christmas gift for my parents. Every time I shaped the clay, something was wrong with it. I quit and left without any dish at all.
Perils of Being a Perfectionist
As from the previous examples, being a perfectionist has its flaws! It wastes time and energy. It also causes stress and anxiety. Fear of making a mistake can also stymie achievements, as in Michelangelo’s case. St. Teresa of Avila said, “He who makes no mistakes, makes nothing.”
Positive Results of Imperfections
Not achieving perfection keeps us humble. It protects us from having a big head and thinking we are better then other people. It may even make us realize that we need God’s help.
At times, good might result from failure. When a dish or vase is broken, the Japanese art of Kintsugi transforms it into something beautiful. The pottery is repaired with gold.
Imperfection can have surprising, good consequences. When I played five classical pieces for an audience of 176, I messed up every one of them despite having practiced for weeks. I made comments like, “You should have been here yesterday when I practiced.” “Am I making you nervous?” “Let’s try that again.” Afterwards people said I was the comic relief for the long program. They loved my personality. They thought I was hilarious. So the fiasco had its benefits.
The Imperfections of Saints
Saints were not all beautiful or handsome. They were not all smart or pleasant to be with. A old book is titled Saints with Tilted Halos. Saints (other than our Blessed Mother) were not morally perfect. St. Therese of Lisieux was sensitive and proud. St. Jerome had a temper, and he and St. Augustine traded mean letters. The apostles James and John argued about who would be the greatest in heaven.
St. Francis de Sales said, “We must not be disturbed at our imperfections, since for us perfection consists in fighting against them. How can we fight against them unless we see them or overcome them unless we face them.”
Jesus
To some people Jesus was a failure. No doubt he felt like one on some days—as when the apostles didn’t understand his lessons and when disciples walked away from him. The gossip in Nazareth was that he was out of his mind. Religious leaders said he was possessed and accused him of faults. Romans viewed him as an unsuccessful king. Regardless, he did save all humankind.
Lent: A Time for Aiming High
We have the next weeks to perfect ourselves when it comes to living as a follower of Jesus. It’s time to evaluate our lives, check on our virtues, confess our sins, and begin again. Besides, or instead of, giving up chocolate or donuts, we might focus on eliminating one or more faults or adopting a practice (like extra time devoted to prayer) to bring us closer to holiness.
If you haven’t decided on a Lenten practice yet, here are some ideas from the Sisters of Notre Dame:
May you have a successful Lent, even though you might slip up a little!
On YouTube there are dozens of videos about failing. Here is one:
• When have you profited by not being a perfectionist?
• When has a failure led to something good?
The Sense of Smell: An Underappreciated Gift of God?
In the book The Heartbeat of Faith: Fifty-Nine Poems, Fingerplays, and Prayers that I wrote for little children is this poem:
My Nose
With my nose I smell things like these:
Bacon, popcorn, and Christmas trees,
Babies, roses, and apple pie.
And this is probably the reason why
My nose has such an important place —
Right in the middle of my face.
The Sense of Smell
The sense of smell, one of our five senses, is an ingenious invention that you might thank God for. Together with our sense of taste, it creates flavor and helps us enjoy food like bacon and wine. It protects us from danger as when a whiff tells us that milk has gone sour, our supper is burning, or there is a skunk in the neighborhood. Smells whet our appetite and affect our mood. Lavender sprayed on our pillow might help us to sleep.
Some smells are pleasant like lilac air freshener, the fragrances of flowers, and the mingled scents in a wine’s bouquet. We use perfume, cologne, and deodorants to smell better. Still other smells are repulsive like stinky feet, dirty clothes, or garbage.
Smell even plays a role in mating among animals and humans as well. You’ve probably heard of pheromones.
Aromas can evoke memories. The smell of today’s freshly baked bread reminds me of the delicious loaves my mother made.
In the past it was thought that our nose could identify 10,000 different smells. However, recent research shows that our noses can detect one trillion difference odors. Yes, one trillion! (To compare, our eyes distinguish only about ten million colors and our ears detect just ½ million tones.)
One of the Best Aromas
How This Sense Works
The mechanisms involved in smelling are complicated, and different theories are advanced to explain the process. Essentially, odor is carried by molecules of chemicals floating in the air. When these enter our noses, neuron receptors with hair-like projections detect them. We have 450 types of receptors, while dogs have twice as many. These receptors send electrical impulses to the brain, which interprets them as specific smells in an amazing tenth of a second. Different people have different sense of smells, depending on their genes.
More complete explanations of the biology of smelling can be found on the Internet.
When the Sense of Smell Disappears
Glasses or contact lenses improve our sense of sight, and hearing aids improve our sense of hearing. What about the sense of smell? During a cold not being able to smell is annoying and affects our taste too, but eventually it comes back. Some people lose their sense of smell more drastically, for instance, from COVID. Retraining therapy may work. This consists of smelling about eight of strong smells like peppermint and peanut butter every day, each for about two minutes, and recalling times you have experienced that odor. Memory will jog your brain to start identifying the smells.
Memory and Smells
Here is a little experiment: Imagine how each thing listed smells. Although you are not actually sensing it, your brain will recall it, sort of virtually.
The smell after rain
A rose
Your favorite wine
A pine tree
A cedar chest
An orange
An onion
Freshly baked bread
A skunk (sorry!)
Your favorite perfume
Sense of Smell in Other Creatures
Here is some information you probably don’t need to know: snakes smell partially with their tongues, which they constantly project. Fish smell by taking in water through their nares, roseate-shaped circles on the sides of their head. Insects smell with their antennae. Birds have a poor sense of smell, while whales and dolphins apparently have none. Elephants smell with nostrils at the end of their trunks and can detect water twelve miles away!
Types of Noses
Noses come in different shapes and sizes. People who aren’t satisfied with theirs can modify them through surgery. Shapes of noses have been associated with certain kinds of personalities.
Noses in Idioms
Since words fascinate me, I wondered how many expressions are related to noses. As a child, often I heard my mother describing me as having my “nose in a book.” Here are few of the dozens of ways we use “nose.”
- Cut off your nose to spite your face
- Have your nose in the air
- Keep your nose clean.
- On the nose
- Powder one’s nose
- Right under one’s nose
- Rub someone’s nose in something
- Put your nose to the grindstone
- Stick your nose in
- Get your nose out of joint
- Have your nose in a book
- Thumb one’s nose at
- Won by a nose
- Count noses
- Look down your nose at
- Can’t look past the end of your nose
- Plain as the nose on our face
- Turn your nose up
An Unrelated Bonus
While getting rid of excess documents and videos on my computer, I came across this video that has nothing to do with noses, but is fascinating. Enjoy …
• What are some of your favorite fragrances?
Saints for Black History Month
In this month devoted to Black History, we Catholics remember and honor several Black Saints and Saints-to-Be. On a table in the Gathering Room of our Sisters of Notre Dame chapel in Chardon, Ohio, you can see a display of their pictures.
On the window sills along a hall stand their pictures with a quotation from them. This week I’m letting them help produce this blog post . . .
How appropriate that February is the month of St. Valentine’s Day, a celebration of love. These holy people loved God with all their heart.
Last week I introduced St. Martin de Porres. Today may I present Saint Josephine Bakhita, who is not well-known. She died the year I was born, 1947, and became the first African woman to be canonized in modern times. She is the patron saint of Sudan, which definitely needs her intercession nowadays.
Saint Josephine Bakhita
Josephine was born in Sudan around 1869, one of seven children in a well-to-do family. About the age of 8, Arab slave traders abducted her and and forced her to walk barefoot about 600 miles to El-Obeid. She was so shocked that she forgot her name; her enslavers called her Bakhita, Arab for lucky, and made her embrace Islam. On the journey she was sold twice.
In El-Obeid, an Arab bought her as a maid. One of his sons who was offended by her whipped and kicked her so cruelly that she was confined to her straw bed for over a month. Her next owner, a Turkish general, had her serve two women who whipped and beat her every day. They subjected to the horrific traditional custom of scarring. In all, 114 patterns were cut into her skin and filled with salt.
Improved Conditions
In 1883, Bakhita was bought by a kind Italian man and two years later left for Italy with him. After riding a camel for 400 miles, they arrived at a Sudan port and sailed to Italy. She was given to a friend, Augusto Michieli, and became a nanny to his daughter.
Although the Michielis went to Sudan to prepare to move there, the daughter and Bakhita were left in the care of the Canossian Sisters in Venice. Bakhita said, “Those holy mothers … introduced me to that God who from childhood I had felt in my heart without knowing who He was.”
When it was time to go to Sudan, Bakhita refused to leave. A court ruled that because the British had outlawed slavery in Sudan before she was born and in Italy it was illegal, she had never legally been a slave. She was free and chose to remain with the Canossians.
Conversion and Vocation
Bakhita was baptized, given the name Josephine, confirmed, and received Communion from the future Pope Pius X. Jesus became her “Master.” She joined the Canossians. For 42 years she was cook, sacristan, sewer, and doorkeeper at the same convent. When she visited other convents, she helped to prepare Sisters for work in Africa. She was known for her gentleness and humility.
Despite later pain and sickness, Sister Josephine was cheerful. One Saturday, when asked how she was, she replied, “I am so happy: Our Lady … Our Lady.” Those were her dying words.
When asked “What would you do if you were to meet your captors?” Josephine replied, “If I were to meet those who kidnapped me, and even those who tortured me, I would kneel and kiss their hands. For, if these things had not happened, I would not have been a Christian and a religious today.”
Sister Thea Bowman
You may recall that in 1989 Sister Thea Bowman addressed the United States Bishops and concluded by having them sing “We Shall Overcome” during which they linked arms. She is now a Servant of God, a step on the way to canonization. Here is a video of Mahalia Jackson singing that song:
Here also is a powerful video of Sister Thea’s speech to the bishops:
I’ve encountered sundry wonderful Black people in my personal history, such as my first-, second-, and fourth-grade teachers, a librarian in the public library I visited as a child, a schoolmate at Notre Dame Academy, a librarian and two housekeepers at Notre Dame College, the maintenance man at Regina High School, Cleveland’s Franciscan bishop, and the pastoral minister in our Health Care Center.
- Which Black person has enriched your life?
Saint for Black History Month, Martin de Porres
A saint for Black History Month that comes to mind is the Dominican laybrother St. Martin de Porres. As patron saint of racial justice, this mulatto is the go-to intercessor for today when strife between races is rampant.
My Experience with St. Martin
St. Martin had the gift of healing. When I was in great pain from a herniated disc in my neck, I dreaded having surgery, so I prayed to him for a cure. Then a Sister informed me that a sign St. Martin was going to intercede for you was that you would see a mouse! (That stems from the time Martin found mice nibbling at church vestments and instead of killing them, escorted a horde of them outside. He made a deal: if they would stay outside he would feed them every day, which he did.) Notice the two mice in the painting above.
Reluctant to come across a mouse, I switched intercessors and turned from Martin to St. Francis of Assisi. Nevertheless, as I watched the movie Babe, I saw three mice acting as the narrators! I didn’t mind that kind of mice. And, yes, doctors healed me.
Who Is Saint Martin?
Jean Martin de Porres Velazquez was born in Lima, Peru, on December 9, 1579. He was the illegitimate son of a Spanish gentleman and a former slave of African and Native descent from Panama. Martin’s racially mixed heritage denied him any rights as a Spanish citizen. After his sister was born, their father abandoned the family, leaving them in poverty. After two years of primary school, Martin was apprenticed to a surgeon-barber and was trained as a pharmacist, doctor, and surgeon.
Vocation
At age 15, Martin was received by the Dominicans, first as a servant and then as an almoner, begging money from the rich to assist the needy. He still did barbering and was dubbed the Saint of the Broom because he did menial work in the kitchen, laundry, and housekeeping. Eight years later, he prior disregarded the law and let Martin take vows as a Third Order Dominican. Some of the 300 men in the monastery mocked Martin.
Spirituality
Devoted to the Blessed Sacrament, Martin spent hours in prayer. He also practiced severe penances.
Humility
When he was 34, Martin became a Dominican lay brother and was assigned to the community infirmary. It’s said that he refused this promotion several times. Supposedly when the abbey was in debt, he proposed, “I am only a poor mulatto, sell me.”
St. Martin’s Supernatural Gifts
When an epidemic broke out, novices who fell ill were confined to locked quarters. Undeterred, Martin passed through locked doors to care for each patient.
It is said he had the gifts of levitation, bilocation, miraculous knowledge, and an ability to communicate with animals. Miraculous cures were attributed to Martin before and after his death at age sixty.
Charity
Martin’s universal charity was expressed by tender compassion for the individual. No one was turned away. His gift was that of “ministry to all.” He even opened an animal hospital at his sister’s house. I wonder what she thought of that!
When the Prior reprimanded Martin for disobeying by bringing a sick person into his room, the Saint said, “Please correct me if the rule of obedience takes precedence over that of charity.” The Prior then let Martin free to serve others in any way necessary.
Martin established an orphanage and a hospital for poor children.
Martin was beatified in 1837 and canonized in 1962. This first Black saint of the Americas has an impressive job description. He is the patron of racial harmony, people of mixed race, barbers, innkeepers, public health workers, and animals. His feast is celebrated on November 3.
St. Martin of Porres, pray for us.
Another Healer Saint like St. Martin
Last year I came across “Saint Padre Pio’s Powerful Healing Prayer,” which is quite beautiful. Besides praying it myself, I’ve been passing it out. You might add it to your daily prayers too.
Heavenly Father, I thank you for loving me.
I thank you for sending your Son,
Our Lord Jesus Christ, to the world to save and to set me free.
I trust in your power and grace that sustain and restore me.
Loving Father,
touch me now with your healing hands,
for I believe that your will is for me to be well in mind, body, soul, and spirit.
Cover me with the most precious blood of your Son,
our Lord, Jesus Christ, from the top of my head to the soles of my feet.
Cast anything that should not be in me.
Root out any unhealthy and abnormal cells.
Open any blocked arteries or veins and rebuild and replenish any damaged areas.
Remove all inflammation and cleanse any infection
by the power of Jesus’s precious blood.
Let the fire of your healing love pass through my entire body
to heal and make new any diseased areas
so that my body will function the way you created it to function.
Touch also my mind and my emotions,
even the deepest recesses of my heart.
Saturate my entire being with your presence,
love, joy, and peace, and draw me ever closer to you every moment of my life.
And, Father, fill me with your Holy Spirit
and empower me to do your works
so that my life will bring glory and honor to your holy name.
I ask this in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ.
Amen.
You might be interested in learning more about Padre Pio. This video is about an hour long:
Christ the Healer
Of course, the greatest healer of all time is Jesus Christ. He healed a wounded world and while on earth tirelessly cured people suffering from various ailments. Today he makes his healing available through the sacrament of the Anointing of the Sick. Let’s pray to him to heal our country.
• What do you find most inspiring about St. Martin?
• To whom do you pray when you are sick?
A Smile Can Change Your Day
A smile can change your day. You probably heard the riddle “What is the longest word in the dictionary?” The answer is “smiles” because there is a mile between the two “ses.” A smile is a universal language and called the cornerstone of our social fabric. Smiling has several positive effects. Research shows that it even prolongs your life. How? The physical act stimulates your brain to put you in a good mood, and happier people tend to live longer.
The Smithsonian Magazine has a whole article devoted to smiling.
Smiling is virtuous. Saint Teresa of Calcutta said, “Every time you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing.” It signals friendship.
A Smile’s Other Positive Effects
A Smile Promotes Health
You smile when you are happy, but you can also make an artificial smile, as when you say, “Cheese,” for a photo. It makes no difference if your smile is genuine or faked, it tricks your mind and makes you healthier. Smiling reduces stress, lowers blood pressure, and boosts your immune system. It releases the happy hormones and so functions as an antidepressant. It can even reduce pain.
A Smile Is Contagious
Try smiling at the clerk at the checkout counter and see that this is true. Likewise, when someone smiles at you, you smile back. A smile forms a bond between people.
A Smile Brings Beauty to Your Face
A smile lightens up a face and makes you look more youthful, a natural Botox. Therefore it makes you more attractive. People assume you are a good person. Frowns and scowls do the opposite. Smiling also makes you look competent.
A Smile Encourages
Smiling puts people at ease. Once when I ended up the leader of a procession in a large church, I was nervous and unsure about what to do. As I walked down the aisle toward the bishop seated in the front, he smiled broadly, instantly calming me.
A Smile Makes You More Confident
Here’s a tip: Smile at yourself in the mirror. It has the same physical and mental effects as smiling at someone else, especially if you accompany it with positive self-talk. By the way it was found that children smile 400 times a day while adults average 20 a day. I wonder how those numbers were arrived at!
The Most Authentic Smile
The most pleasing smile is one that makes the corners of your eyes wrinkle with crow’s feet. It involves two sets of muscles: the ones that lift the corners of your mouth and the ones that lift your cheeks. This is called a genuine or Duchenne smile, named for a 19th century scientist who mapped the muscles of the human body. It makes for true enjoyment. By the way, turning a frown upside down to form a smile may not really require more muscles. It’s not known how many muscles are involved in a smile. It depends on the kind of smile.
Here is a short video of a happy baby that is sure to bring a smile to your face: https://youtu.be/KSyCeCK-wCE?si=Yi-bmX3rv_qexAs-
Smiling in Photographs
In photos from olden days, people are not smiling. There are several theories about the reason for this. One is that people considered smiling in a photo undignified. Another is that people had bad teeth. (I can identify with this. For my First Communion photos, I couldn’t smile because my front teeth were in great need of braces!) In religious art, Jesus is seldom depicted laughing or smiling. Here is a rare one:
A Smiling Emoji
In the 1960s an insurance company commissioned Harvey Ross Ball was commissioned to create an image to boost its employees’ morale. Ball did it in ten minutes and was paid $45. In the 1970s, brothers who owned two Hallmark shops copyrighted the iconic face. In France a journalist trademarked the design, called it Smiley and founded the Smiley Company. Lawsuits ensued.
Now smiley faces are ubiquitous. I just added one to a text yesterday.
Our Smiling Saint
Saint Julie Billiart, the spiritual mother of us Sisters of Notre Dame, despite terrific sufferings, smiled a lot. In her village, when she was a young woman who cared for others, people dubbed her “The Saint Who Smiles.”
Songs about Smiling
The lyrics to Charlie Chaplin’s song “Smile” make sense:
Smile tho’ your heart is aching,
Smile even though it’s breaking,
When there are clouds in the sky- You’ll get by,
If you smile through your fear and sorrow,
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You’ll see the sun come shining through- For you.
Light up your face with gladness,
Hide ev’ry trace of sadness,
Altho’ a tear may be ever so near,
That’s the time you must keep on trying,
Smile- What’s the use of crying?
You’ll find that life is still worthwhile,
If you just smile.
There are two more popular songs about smiling. Bing Crosby recorded the song “Let a Smile Be Your Umbrella.”
And Frank Sinatra gave us this one:
• When has someone’s smile brightened your day?
