Gratitude and Hope Make for Joy
As little children, after we were given something, we probably heard our parents coax, “What do you say?” We learned the importance of expressing thanks. I’m currently reading a book about growing a grateful heart, which offers some practical ideas. One valuable one is to look for the good when facing adversity. A friend in her eighties was diagnosed with cancer. Her positive response was, “For all these years I’ve enjoyed good health. Thank God for that!” Last week because of the threat of icy weather, I cancelled my flight to Maryland. This entailed hours of debating whether to cancel or not, followed by phone calls to the airline and the insurance company in an attempt to get a refund. A friend emailed: “Maybe this was God’s way of protecting you.” It turned out that on the evening I was to speak, everything in Maryland was closed. If I had made the trip, I wouldn’t have given my talk and the journey would have been in vain! (Not to mention I could have been killed on the icy roads.)
Common wisdom advises dwelling on the positive in frustrating circumstances: “When you’re given lemons, make lemonade.” “Look for the silver lining.” “Consider the glass half full instead of half empty.” It’s reported that when Thomas Edison tried to make a storage battery, it took 10,000 tries before succeeding. Someone, asked, “Didn’t you feel bad about wasting time on all those failures?” The inventor replied, “I haven’t failed. I learned ten thousand things that didn’t work.”
Sometimes we can look back at our lives and realize that tough times held a gift. And then we can be thankful. Did you ever have a car accident that led to experiencing the kindness of people? Did you ever go to a dreaded meeting or job and meet someone there who made a significant difference in your life? Did you ever fail at something but then move on to a more satisfying success? If so, you know that no matter how bleak the day is, you can always have hope. A personal example: A publisher rejected my proposal for a book on Mary. My heart sank. But then I decided to self-publish the book. This way I could write it as I wished and also design the format and cover. Plus the book was out in weeks instead of months. Today a man called to say how much he liked the book, a Sister emailed to say she is using my “lovely, lovely book,” and a woman stopped me to say her granddaughter is enjoying “Heart to Heart with Mary.” And the day isn’t over yet! Thank you, God, for that rejection.
Focusing on our blessings cultivates hope in our hearts and makes us optimistic, and therefore more apt to cope with future trials.
Jesus teaches us to be thankful. When only one leper he healed returned to give thanks, he asked, “Where are the other nine?” 
Could be they were so elated about their restored life, that they forgot about thanking the giver. When wonderful things happen to us, let’s not forget to send a prayer of thanks heavenward. By the way, Jesus endured terrific horrors, but focusing on the good that would come from it no doubt helped him persevere.
When have you experienced good coming from a bad thing? Hope you remembered to thank God!
Thank you for reading my blog!
Down with Distractions During Prayer
Apparently our brains have more than one track. Maybe as you’re praying the rosary, you’re planning what you’ll have for dinner and before you know it, you’ve prayed the closing prayer. Maybe you’re reading a prayer, like the Divine Office, and your eyes are following the words, but when you’re finished, you don’t know what you’ve said to God because you were dwelling on a problem. During prayer, stray thoughts can pester us like gnats. Buddhists refer to “monkey minds,” that is, just as monkeys leap from tree to tree, our brains leap from one thought to another. How helpful it would be if we were rapt in ecstasy as some saints were! Praying would be much easier. Many suggestions are given to combat distractions: focus on a candle, play music, look at a religious picture, weave them into your prayer. However, I’ve found one ploy to be 100% effective.
When I was writing a religion series, my meditation time was usually invaded by thoughts for the next lesson plan, the format for the pages, and how to deal with the publisher. Frustrated, I asked my spiritual director, a good Jesuit, “Can you help me?” This is what he said:
Every day take out a pen and paper and begin, “Dear Jesus.” Then write him a letter telling him whatever is in your heart. This may be about your upcoming day, your worries, people you care about—anything. When you are finished, sign the letter, “Love, Kathleen.” But you’re not done. Begin a new letter, “Dear Kathleen” and write a letter from Jesus to you. Sign it, “Love, Jesus.” My first reaction to this second letter was that I didn’t want to be putting words in Jesus’ mouth. But Father said, “Don’t consciously think about what Jesus would or should say to you. Just let the pen go by itself. This is important. You will be surprised.”
The next morning, being a good sister, I did what the priest had advised. There was no room for distractions! Amazingly, that afternoon something happened that Jesus had referred to in the morning’s letter. I continued this practice of letter writing day after day. Some of the things Jesus wrote to me were powerful and touching. But then it occurred to me that because my work entailed writing all day long, my precious prayer time had become too much like my work. I got tired of writing letters. When I told Father this, I asked if I should stop. He replied, “No. Just make your letters shorter.”
So each morning I wrote only one or two sentences in the two letters, like postcards. (“Wish you were here!”) Surprisingly, the words had the same benefits. They made me realize Jesus’ presence more. His words to me were moving.
Father also suggested that after a time I go back and read the letters, maybe annotating them. When I did this, I found I had a record of my life during that period.
Once after I gave a weekend retreat on Scripture the man who came in the evening to provide entertainment said, “I’m sorry I missed the retreat today. Tell me one thing you said.” I shared the letter writing idea with him. He said, “I did that once on my computer. In Jesus’ letter to me were things I did not know. It scared me and I never did it again!”
I pass this unusual prayer idea on to you. Try it and let me know what you think.
Perhaps you already write such letters. If so, what has been your experience?
Why Our Lady of Lourdes? Prayer and Penance
Today is February 11, the feast of Our Lady of Lourdes. There are 69 approved miracles of physical healing that occurred at Lourdes, France. (About 7,000 have been submitted.) But perhaps there are many more miracles of spiritual healing resulting from Mary’s visit to Earth back in 1858. I’m willing to bet that almost every family has at least one member who is in need of a miracle, physical or spiritual. We can help heal these sick people by enlisting Mary’s aid. After all, she has been declared our mother by the Church and by Jesus himself. She is the one who prompted Jesus’ first public miracle when the wine had run out at Cana—and at a time when he wasn’t inclined to do so! This Jewish mother has clout with her Son. Here is today’s reflection from my book “Heart to Heart with Mary,” which you might find meaningful right now:
Praying for Sinners
Our Lady of Lourdes
February 11
My child, most people associate Lourdes, France, with healing waters, the rosary, and the Immaculate Conception. Sadly, many overlook the main purpose of my visits there—to urge everyone to pray and do penance for the conversion of sinners. I have the identical message for you, dear one.
My heart aches for my children who continue to disregard God’s laws, harming others and themselves. They are teetering on the edge of a deep pit. They are oblivious to the grave danger they are in—close to losing eternal life. Someone in your family or a friend of yours may be among these lost sheep. If so, I understand how you wish they would turn their life around.
My son’s sacrifice needn’t be in vain in their case. Pray to me for the wayward people you are concerned about—by name if possible. I will join my prayers with yours to the Father. With my help you might also perform acts of penance for their sake. Together we can work to ensure that those you care for are saved. I look forward to tenderly embracing all of you in the next world.
Talk to Mary about how you can respond to her request.
We also celebrate Valentine’s Day this week. We might remember that tremendous Lover whose sacred heart was pierced for love 
of us. He wants nothing more than to have us love him passionately in return.
I’ve never been to Lourdes, have you? If so, what was it like? Did you bathe in the healing waters there?
Here is a video of the procession at Lourdes when the hymn “Immaculate Mary” is sung”:
Who Are You? A VIP
This past Saturday I gave a Spirit Day retreat to forty-six eighth graders. I told them that I had recently watched the movie “The Lion King” again. In it Simba’s father states this memorable line to his son: “Remember who you are.” Simba is from a line of kings who someday will be responsible for ruling his land. Who are we? We are beings created by the almighty God and belong to him. As such we are noble creatures with an innate dignity. We are children of God, adopted at baptism, who have heaven for our inheritance. Therefore we are beloved sons and daughters of God. We are Christians, committed to Jesus and following the way he taught, or at least trying to. We are his friends and disciples. (The word means “students” or “apprentices.”) From our baptism we share in Christ’s mission as prophet, priest, and king. As prophet, we speak God’s word; as priest, we offer sacrifice for the world; and as king, we are a royal people. We are all Most Valuable Players. But on some days we don’t feel like all those glorious things. We make mistakes. People criticize or ignore us. We are frightened or cowardly. Our self-esteem is burst like a bubble. Then it is a challenge to remember who we are.
I shared with the retreatants the following story that may be familiar to you:
Once a lion cub, whose mother had been killed by hunters, was found by a herd of goats. They adopted him and raised him with their young. He was led to believe that he was a goat. One day when the goats were grazing in a field, in stalked a great lion-king. He gave a mighty roar, terrifying the goals. They all ran into the jungle except for the lion cub who thought he was a goat. He was alone with the lion-king.
At first the lion cub was afraid. The lion roared again. The cub only bleated and romped in the grace. The lion king realized that the cub thought her was a goat. So the lion picked him up by the scruff of the neck and carried him to a pond, hoping the cub would see that he was like him. But all the cub did was bleat like a goat, puzzled and frightened.
Next the lion-king put a piece of meat in front of the cub. The cub shrank back, horrified. But then, he tasted the meat. Suddenly the lion cub lifted his head and set the jungle echoing with a mighty roar.
Christ is like the lion-king. He tells us who we are. We are created to be fully human, noble, the kind of person he was. Through the grace of the sacraments, the Spirit enables us to be who we were meant to be, the one God dreamed we would be. We can always call on his help.
When we doubt our self-worth, we only need to look at a crucifix. Jesus thought we were so important that he willingly suffered 
tortures and death for our sake. It’s said that if we were the only one in the world, he would have done the same. You know the symbol of God’s eye, which is on every dollar bill? It doesn’t mean that God is always watching to see when we mess up. Rather, God loves us so much that he can’t take his eyes off us.
When do you feel like a VIP?
Holy Boldness, a Grace from the Holy Spirit
As I was contemplating making holy boldness the topic of this post, surfing TV channels took me to a preacher who was speaking on— guess what? holy boldness! Talk about affirmation. Perhaps someone (maybe me) needs to be encouraged to practice this virtue. Holy boldness is the courage to do something daring for God’s sake, the faith, or the love of others. Back in 2016, I wrote about Mary’s holy boldness https://bit.ly/2S5UEGG. This was manifested in her original yes to being God’s mother and again when as a young pregnant girl, she braved the difficult journey to help her pregnant cousin Elizabeth. There are other bold ancestors in our spiritual tree. At the ripe old age of seventy-five, Abraham dared to move his household to an unknown land. Moses confronted Pharaoh and made an outrageous demand to free his slaves. David dared to face Goliath. Esther came before her Gentile husband and king, knowing that she might be killed for it. Ruth followed her mother-in-law to a land of strangers. Peter got out of a boat and walked on water. Jesus spoke out against the misguided religious leaders, knowing that it would not end well.
Down through the centuries, saints have exhibited extraordinary courage: Thomas More standing firm against King Henry VIII who declared himself head of the Church; Isaac Jogues and the other North American martyrs preaching to the Native Americans; Mother Frances Xavier Cabrini overcoming her fear of the ocean and crossing it thirty-four times; and Oscar Romero speaking up for the poor in El Salvador despite death threats.
Two young Vietnamese sisters moved in with us this month in order to attend college. I marvel at their bravery in going to a foreign 
land, learning English in Wisconsin, living with a different community, and learning how to drive. They now have to drive in snow, which they don’t have in their country! Their love for God powers their courage.
The Holy Spirit is the source of holy boldness. This was brought out dramatically on Pentecost. When those cowardly apostles who deserted Jesus in his hour of need were filled with the Holy Spirit a few days later, they were new men. None of them was a rabbi or well educated, but they boldly went forth preaching the Good News. Yes, they were aware that they could be executed for this as Jesus was. It made no difference.
That same Holy Spirit was given to us at Baptism and deepened at Confirmation. Fortitude is one of the seven gifts the Spirit infused into us. We can tap into this gift and be daring ourselves. This sometimes requires a leap of faith. The first time I was invited to speak to catechists in Abu Dhabi, I had to muster all my courage and say yes. And what a wonderful experience that visit turned out to be. I can recall other times when I had the opportunity do something that called for courage (and trust), but I said no. Bet you can too. One motivation to act with courage is the conviction that God is always with us, supporting us to do what is good. With divine help, we too can walk on water.
Here are eight ways to exercise holy boldness:
- Speak up when someone is being bullied, gossiped about, or slandered.
- Travel somewhere that may be dangerous in order to help, for example, to the border to assist immigrants or to a flooded area to rescue victims.
- State your opinion when it differs from what the majority in the group thinks, such as in discussions about abortion or capital punishment.
- Go to Sunday Mass when no one else in your family or group of friends does, or when it might snow.
- Say grace before meals even in a restaurant.
- Take advantage of opportunities to explain the Catholic faith but in a sensitive way.
- Pray for people in need of prayers on the spot so they can hear your prayers.
- Offer to give a witness talk, teach a course, or give a presentation on the faith. (Speaking in front of a group is known to be the number one human fear.)
Can you add a way or two?
When have you conquered fear to spread the faith or to live it out?
Josh Groban sings “Be Not Afraid”:
